Blogger's Note: I am pleased to present our second guest post in our 12 Days of Criticismas. This one comes from my buddy Rhett Paro, a lover of movies, particularly of the 1980's "coming of age" variety. John Huges is his wheelhouse. But today he shares his thoughts on possibly the worst filmed production of all time, in virtually every respect, the infamous Star Wars Holiday Special. Enjoy!
Who doesn’t love to see Jimmy Stewart receive the answer to his existential question “What if I had never been born?” It is so overwhelming no matter how many times it is on TV, all of America gets choked up. Or who can’t relate to little Kevin, though he is such a disease, defending his home and finding his family truly is important? Or who refuses to giggle as Bill Murray is confronted by the three spirits of Christmas? These are only some of the classic Christmas cinema gems (or change the word cinema, but it should be plural) we enjoy. Now set those aside.This Christmas I want to invite you to enjoy the best of the worst. Call your friends, pop some corn, grab a beverage, and be prepared for the best worst experience of the season. The Star Wars Holiday Special will not disappoint if your desire is to sit in stunned silence, broken only by a friend’s wise crack and laughter. Read on and you will discover why it is the worst...and the best for your holiday viewing.
Why It’s the Worst
This holiday special is so bad it is hard to know where to begin. The premise: Chewbacca must get back to his family to celebrate Life Day (yeah that’s it), and now you know as much about Life Day as when you finish the movie. How can that be? Not sure, but the fact that you have Wookies speaking in their native tongue for a straight 6 to 10 minutes UNTRANSLATED will not aid your comprehension. This happens several times!
That aside, what else is excruciating? The foreshadowing of what Star Wars would become. A great idea which is now a cash cow for someone we thought was cool. Is this really the guy who also gave the world Raiders of the Lost Ark? Do salt and fresh water flow from the same spring? It is clear to me now: Mrs. Lucas was a huge influence on the original Star Wars Trilogy. It makes sense they divorced in 1983…hmmm. The truth is George didn’t change when he wrote episodes 1, 2, and 3 - just the writer did!
Why It’s the Best
This movie has some of the best worst but very quotable lines. Who doesn’t want to hear lines like, “Look here a pocket sized aquarium, you can take it with you anywhere” or “You could say she did it by Hand…Solo. I know you know what I mean…You do know what I mean don’t you?” Classic!
Don't overlook the mockability factor. Everything from the story line to character names (Chewy’s dad is named Itchy) to hilarious late 70’s graphics, it is all good – for mocking! Make sure whoever you invite is very sarcastic and able to apply a thick coat of satire as you view. Other movies might be cliche or tired, but few present such an awesome opportunity for unbridled lampooning.
What truly makes Star Wars Holiday the best, is the time you will spend with family and friends. When else will your mom tell you to lose a few pounds? Or where else can you see your uncle Eddie have a few too many eggnog and brandies?
So get cozy with your friends and family, and though you might be the family screw up just remember, you're not responsible for what you're about to see.
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